Breaking News: Seattle Catcher Suspended for the Season for Steroids.

[Porter]

SEATTLE (AP)- Commissioner Nick Mitchell suspended Seattle Catcher Mario Villatorro for the season after finding a horse sedative on his drug test. Seattle officials realized the difference after drastically improving his contact hitting late last season. It was enough for him to make Seattle opening day roster this season. Instantly after gaining playing time for M's, he started to lose his muscle strength and his vision drastically. There is no truth to the rumor that they will dock the Mariners 5 games for this travesty of a story. Seattle will comply by bringing up Wolfgang Cutler to start in his spot.

"This is why we signed Jesus (Flores) I guess," stated baffled newly hired GM Barry Bonds, "To clean up the image of the much maligned Mariner Franchise." The Mariners are currently 3rd in the AL West with a 15-10 record.

[Kingdom]

Co-Commishioner Donald Fehr Kingdom is fining Porter99 for making a dumb thread.

[Porter]

Here's something for you.

Who gives a shit.

[browntown653]

Huh?

[Porter]

I was trying to make light of the fact my backup catcher lost 4 talent points in contact within a week. It was a trainwreck, like my brackets right now.