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Who will win the NLCS?
- 777rak
Not the Atlanta Braves.
What player is the definition of "obese ass" in the MLB?
- Dry1313
There are some really huge mofos in baseball, but no one comes close to the Big Kahuna, David Ortiz.
You ever see this guy run the bases? It’s comedy gold.
Other guys who can easily be considered obese asses:
- pitcher Dennys Reyes of the Twins who weighs close to 400 lbs;
- pitcher Joe Borowski of the Marlins who is really huge;
- catcher Bengie Molina of the Blue Jays is a freaking whale;
- designated hitter Matt Stairs of whatever team he plays for now;
- infielder Matt Lecroy of the Washington Nationals
and last but not least, one of the most overrated fat men in baseball history, Fernando Tatis of the Orioles who is mockingly referred to as “Fatis” by Expos fans;
If you came across Carmen Electra's dead but warm body, would you **** her?
- love_that_reefer
No, no I would not. You’re a sick person.
Two things to keep in mind here. First off, boning a corpse is illegal in many states, usually a misdemeanor or felony; in California, where Electra lives, the penalty is up to 8 years in prison. Secondly, wouldn’t that be considered rape? We have to assume that Electra would not have consented if she were alive, so we have to assume the same if she were dead.
Besides, I’m not “into” that sort of stuff. Obviously you are. You disgust me.
In the Terminator, the T-800 (Schwarzenegger) is sent back in time to the 1980s to kill Sarah Connor to prevent the future birth of her son John, but Kyle Reese is also sent back to the same time to stop the T-800 and eventually impregnates Sarah and John is conceived. However, shouldn't the fact that Sarah's child is fathered by Reese, and not John's father, preclude the existence of John Connor?
- realmofotalk
No. Not at all. Allow me to map this out for you.
What happens in the future is a result of what happens in the past. However, because time travel is possible, what happens in the past is also a result of what happens in the future.
Confused? Okay.
Think of time as a giant line. John Connor is alive in 2029 because Kyle Reese fathered him back in 1984. But Kyle Reese only goes back to 1984 because John Connor sends him there in 2029, right? Right.
However, remember what I told you: time travel is possible. This means that if you were to hop into your time machine and zap to the future for example, you would get there and arrive at a time where stuff is happening, society is much more advanced and people are living their lives.
See what I’m saying? Since time travel is possible, the events in the future have already been determined. The future is not affected by what happens in the present. People’s destinies cannot be changed, contrary to what Back to the Future likes to pretend.
This whole concept is explained in H.G. Wells’ movie The Time Machine. Remember when the dude is out at the park with his girlfriend and she gets shot? Dude hops into his time machine, goes back a few hours in the past and tries to prevent her death. He succeeds, but she ends up getting hit by a car and dies anyways. Her destiny is mapped out.
Same thing in Terminator. Sarah Connor is just living her life in 1984 and suddenly two dudes looking to kill each other arrive out of nowhere.
The fact that Kyle Reese is present in 1984 isn’t because John Connor sent him. John Connor or not, Kyle Reese would have been present in 1984 regardless. It’s not because John Connor in 2029 sent him back to 1984 that John Connor is alive. Remember, the events of 1984 occur before the events of 2029; it’s just that in the movie, it’s presented in a different order. The whole thing is what I like to call a “circular timeline” (the events of the present take place because of the events of the future, but the events of the future can only take place because of the events of the past).
It might take some time to grasp, but I’m not sure I can explain it much better. Regardless, it’s an awesome movie and definitely one of my favorite trilogies.
If you had to take any male athlete out for dinner, who would you take and why?
- Kingdom_of_Zito
Tough question, but it would probably come down to between Shaquille O’Neal (high comedy value) and Mike Tyson (just to see how crazy he really is). I think I’d have to go with Shaq; I would have my money’s worth just from all the bad things he’d say about Kobe Bryant. I am convinced that he has got tons of some dirty secrets on Kobe that would just make me die of laughter.
Other dudes who I might have considered, but did not make the cut, would include: Michael Strahan, Charles Barkley, Dikembe Mutombo, Dennis Rodman, Pedro Martinez, and John McEnroe.
Proponent of flat tax (equal percentage of tax paid regardless of income) or not?
- DiamondDave
Here in Canada, we have a progressive tax system. If I’m not mistaken, incomes of $36,000 or less were taxed at 15%; those between $36,000 and $71,000 at 22%; those between $71,000 and $115,000 were taxed at 26%; and those above $115,000 were taxed at 29%. This is just for federal taxes mind you; when you add on provincial taxes, we’re talking about a total income tax of somewhere between 40% to 60%, or close to that.
And I’ve definitely got no problem with this whatsoever. Low-income persons should pay less tax because they have to spend a higher proportion of their income on necessities; whereas high-income persons have more discretionary income with which they can pay tax.
The problem I do have, however, is that the tax system we have is individual and not on a family basis. So someone who makes an income of say $60,000 will pay several thousand dollars more in tax than let’s say a family where the husband makes $35,000 and the wife makes $25,000, even though in both cases, the gross income is the same. That’s because in the second case, both incomes fall in the “under $36,000” range, so they get taxed individually at 15%, whereas the first dude who makes an income of $60,000 gets taxed at 22%. What kind of stupid shit is that?!
Who should be the next president?
- Porter99
President of what? The United States? Honestly, I don’t give two shits, because whoever it’s going to be will badly fock it up. But I’ll get back to you on this one once we know who both candidates will be. Hit me up when the year 2008 rolls around.
Explain your username and its history.
- General
Back in 1995 when I first started using the internet, the only thing I ever found myself doing (aside from using e-mail and looking for porn) is chatting on IRC. I was a longtime regular on Undernet and hanging out on #baseball and #basketball, and back then, Undernet only allowed nicknames to be 9 characters in length. In the first year or so, I didn’t have a fixed nickname (usually went by whichever baseball player I had a boycrush on at the time), but then a couple of years later, when I was listening to Jay-Z pretty regularly (I am ashamed to admit it), I thought he was pretty awesome and that I had to represent. “DirtyMoney” didn’t fit as a nickname, so … well then the rest is history.
Who is the least athletic player in the MLB?
- Dry1313
Now here’s another thing that I’m ashamed to admit: I own David Wells’ autobiography and in fact I’ve read it cover-to-cover three times. Sad, I know.
Anyways, if you’ve read his book, you’ll see that there’s no doubt that he’s one of the least athletic players in baseball. I’m not sure if he’s the least athletic because there are about 650 players, but he’d have to be up there.
Him, or Fernando Tatis.
Elisha Cuthbert or Alanis Morisette?
- Rufio 181
If you’re asking me to pick who’s hotter, then it’s definitely Elisha Cuthbert. By the way, I went to the same high school as she did.
Alanis Morissette is just FUGLY and there is no way around it. I don’t like her style, she’s too Avril Lavigne-ish. Girls like that scare me. I prefer normal women who have big breasts and are teases.
Do you wear condoms or are you a pull out kind of guy?
- love_that_reefer
Condoms only when it’s for anal sessions with your mother or sister. Got to protect myself from their yucky diseases. Ew.
Would that "proposed" Labatt Stadium they were talking about back in the day have saved the Expos?
- Foster
Yes! I am convinced that it would have. For anyone who knows their way around Montreal, the new ballpark would have been open-roof, right in the middle of freaking downtown, right in front of the Bell Centre, and two steps away from Ste-Catherine where all the nightlife and strip clubs are.
That’s what bothers people here so much about the Olympic Stadium: it is all the way at the other end of the freaking island (east end), like 10 km away from downtown and no one wants to go down there. It’s in the dead part of town. There literally is nothing around the Big O; it’s a middle-class residential area.
When the Als (CFL) played football at the Big O, no one showed up. You’d think that you were at a Florida Marlins game. But when the team moved to McGill Stadium to play their games in 1997, people packed the stadium and they have sold out every single freaking game there since the move a decade ago.
It’s all about the atmosphere. The Big O has zero atmosphere, Labatt Stadium would have had plenty. I’m convinced that they could have averaged 30,000 nightly. That would definitely have saved the Expos. Great ballpark + solid attendance = success.
Too bad that Jeffrey Loria and his midget stepson David Samson had to go **** everything up. I blame them, I blame Selig, I blame baseball.
Which hockey player would you beat up in a fight?
- Porter99
Are you asking who I want to beat up in a fight? Or who I able to beat up? Hockey players are tough. I would love to beat up that douchebag Tie Domi. I’m sick of hearing about Tie Domi. And that sluut Belinda Stronach. **** Tie Domi.
Are you a typist; or what is your story behind your high scores in the fast typing arcade game?
- realmofotalk
I am not a typist, but really, after years of using a keyboard, it’s really not that hard. You get better as you gain experience. I just happen to be really awesome.
How many games will Rutgers win this season (football)? Could they beat the Oakland Raiders this season? Better yet, can Oakland beat anyone this season?
- Kingdom_of_Zito
I would love to see Rutgers run the table, since they are OTR (inside joke with my IRC crew), but that probably won’t happen since they still have to play Louisville with Brian Brohm back, and then travel to play in WVU’s house. At worst, they would finish with 2 losses, but it could be only 1.
That said, I hope that WVU runs the table in the Big East because I want to see how this whole BCS mess is going to turn out. If WVU goes undefeated in the Big East and some one-loss team from another conference (probably SEC or Big 10/12) gets into the national championship game ahead of them, then that’s going to be some messed up shit. Or it might make WVU schedule a tougher non-conference schedule that doesn’t include games against the likes of Eastern Washington.
As far as Rutgers’ chances against the Raiders, I would happily lay double-digits points on Rutgers to cover the spread. Easy.
The maximum sentence under Canadian law that Canadian serial rapist and killer Paul Bernardo received was life in prison without parole - fair or unfair?
- realmofotalk
Absolutely. Paul Bernardo is without a doubt the most repulsive, most dangerous mother****er in Canadian criminal history. Just thinking about some of the stuff he did makes me want to vomit. If Canada still had the death penalty, he would without a doubt be first in line at the guillotine. At least since he’s labeled as a dangerous offender, he doesn’t get parole. We’ll never see his face again.
Also, it kind of scares me to know that I live just a few kilometers away from Karla Homolka. I mean, WTF is she doing out of jail? She’s as bad as Bernardo is and should be locked away forever, and instead, she’s just roaming the streets of Montreal like that. Goddamn this makes me sick.
By the way, the whole media circus that surrounded Homolka last year when she was being released from prison was almost O.J.-like. It was that crazy. The people here couldn’t believe that she was actually being let out. And apparently, we’re supposed to be more lax, I could only imagine how pissed off the people in Ontario must have been.
Bottle, can, or draft?
- DiamondDave
I am only an occasional beer drinker, so I couldn’t really say. I guess bottle is better; can is for when you don’t give a shit and want to spend less; draft is okay at the pub.
You know that commercial where the guy throws his cell at the other guy to show off his "security" system or whatever? Ok, if you have a junky cell to throw at any one baseball player and any one football player, who'd you throw it at?
- Kingdom_of_Zito
Easy answer. The baseball player that I would most like to throw a cellphone at is Alex Rodriguez. Fair? Unfair? Who gives a shit. **** A-Rod.
As for the football player, it would easily have to be Lawrence Phillips. He had the one good season in the CFL for the Als, then his wife-beating ass fled away and never came back to face a felony charge he has here. Guess that’s good for us, ‘cuz Lawrence Phillips is one sum***** that we taxpayers don’t deserve the burden inflicted upon us. **** Lawrence Phillips.
Who would be the horror movie character that you would least want to run in to? Freddie? Jason? Michael Myers? Pinhead? Who?
- DiamondDave
Those kids from Village of the Damned have always freaked me out. Have you seen their eyes? Shit, that is scary as heck.
Also, Carrie. You do not want to **** with Carrie. She will mess you up bad.
What was the best memory of the Montreal Expos?
- Porter99
My own best memory of the Montreal Expos was Pedro Martinez striking out his 300th batter of the season back in 1997. That was freaking awesome. We never really had a Cy Young guy like Pedro before, and nothing gets me going quite like dominant starting pitching.
Other great happenings in Expos history: Expos making the playoffs in 1981 (though that’s before I was born), Dennis Martinez’s perfect game, Vladimir Guerrero making a run at 40/40 but getting robbed by a horrible umpire call (he said it was a double when it was clearly a homerun).
Aside from that, there’s not much else. I’m not old enough to remember the first few years of the franchise back in the early 70s, or the Expos’ dynasties of the early to mid-80s.
Who will be the Padres manager next year?
- 777rak
I’m not a freaking psychic, but I’ll say Bruce Bochy.
Favourite Montreal Club/bar/Stripclub?
- Foster
Tons of people here will tell you that Super Sexe or Chez Paree are awesome, and I’m sure they are, but I like to hang out at Champs sports bar. It’s your typical sports bar with literally tons of television monitors, many giant screens, and just about every sports game going on at the time. It’s awesome for Sunday NFL games, especially.
What's the most Canadian thing to say? Eh? Aboot? Hockey? To explain, as it sounds stupid...what phrase, sentence, pronounciation, etc. will say, BAM, this guy is a Canuck?
- General
Hockey, definitely. As varied and diverse is Canada from coast-to-coast, one thing that’s common to all Canadians is their love and passion for hockey. No doubt about that. Also, if you use words such as “Canadian Tire money”, “looney”, or “Tim Hortons”, then you’re definitely Canadian. It’s mostly in non-urban places like Toronto, Vancouver or Montreal, but still, that’s about as Canadian as it gets.
Why won't you die?
- Dry1313
I can’t die now. I have a date with your mom.
Did you ever have a Teddy Rupskin doll?
- love_that_reefer
No, but I bet that you do.
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Originally Posted by Slyder
