Greatest Simpsons Quotes

[Saber]

Once again, my underwear has become caught in a cowcatcher.

[DirtyKash]

"They're dogs!!! And they're playing POKER!!!"

[realmofotalk]

More audio/video clips, DK!

[DirtyKash]

Homer: Yvan eht nioj! Ya gotta love that crazy chorus!
Lisa: What does it mean?
Homer: Ehhhh it doesn't mean anything. It's like "ramma-lama-ding-dong" or "give peace a chance!"

[DirtyKash]

Homer: Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.

[realmofotalk]

The 1st link isn't working, btw.

[DirtyKash]

Freddy: Hey! What the hell is this?
Waiter: It's a bowl of shaudere, sir.
Freddy: Wait a minute, come here. What did you call it? Say it loud enough so everyone can hear. Come on, say it...
Waiter: Ahem. Shaudere.
Freddy: Shau-dere? Shau-dere? IT'S CHOW-DAH! Chowdah! Say it right!
Waiter: [pause] Shau-dear.
Freddy: Come back here! I'm not through demeaning you.

[Lynch]

I don't remember that one at all.

[Hammer]

its the one where bart cut school to go to mayor quimbys nephews party, or some such like that. he saw that he didnt attack the guy, and had to go to court.

[missionhockey21]

Grampa types an angry letter.

When I read your magazine, I don't see one wrinkled face or single
toothless grin. For shame! To the sickos at `Modern Bride' magazine.

[missionhockey21]

Insurence Representative - "Now this place Moe's, this is a business of some kind?"
*Homer thinking* "Don't tell him it's a bar, don't tell him it's a bar...wait...but what else is open that late?"
Homer - "It's a pornography store, I was buying pornography."
*Homer thinking* "Hehe...I would have never thought of that"

[missionhockey21]

Dondelinger: Welcome to Remedial Science 1A. My wife recently passed away. I thought that maybe teaching would ease my loneliness.
Homer: Will this be on the test?
Dondelinger: ....No!
Homer: Ohhh. (Erases "Dead Wife" from his sheet)

---
I've watched that episode on the DVD sometimes just to hear that.

[DirtyKash]

In the episode where Marge becomes a police officer. She walks by Lionel Hutz in an alley next to a legal clinic...

Marge: Hello, Mr. Hutz.
Hutz: I'll have you know the contents of that dumpster are private! You stick your nose in, you'll be violating attorney-dumpster confidentiality.
Marge: I just wanted to say "hello".
Hutz: Oh. Hello. Heh. Heh.

Marge walks off; Lionel Hutz lights the dumpster on fire.

[DirtyKash]

Bart: I don't care if your mom says I'm a bad influence, Milhouse. How many times have I told you, never listen to your mother!

[missionhockey21]

Disco Stu: "Is this seat taken?"
Marge: "Uh, I think that's an armrest."
Stu: "So, do you party?"
Marge: "You mean like a hats and noisemakers kind of party?"
Stu: "Sure, baby, whatever your trip is. Disco Stu wants you to be comfortable while he does his thing."
Marge: "Who's Disco Stu?"